to gen n vic, there is ofcos nth going on between me n zh. wat can there b sia?

anw, kyu grade coming le. scared sia. scared of losing, scared of disappointing myself n mr ho. losing confidence cos i nvr REALLY win in comp before. inscared nid to fight against those NYJCs. wonder if yf will go to this comp n help with the bout( or bulb ) list as usual. maybe not? hais... negative yuki controlling tht thought again. lol. daijoubu, just do my best n smarten up while fighting can le. even if i not strong can use agility. tdy i win su wei n she win me oso both oso ippon sia ( or maybe she won me twice? dun rmb ), so is like tie. but nvm lah, atleast it give rise to my confidence alittle. atleast it proves tht i improve from last time. last time that yuki get beaten everytime she fight with someone, this yuki can atleast win someone. haha :) anw like usual, to me its ok to lose to seniors becos they r obviously more experienced than me so losing is natural. but winning a senior would b great for me cos tht rarely happens. winning someone same age as me is satisfying enough. lol. i always wonder, y some ppl always look so peaceful n like no trouble at all. theres no anger, no grieve just peace. its like nothing in the world matter. aiya i dunno how to say lah, i just see peace in them, but sometimes maybe its because i cant see the complexity of their thoughts. lol. getting confusin here. lol. i honestly have no idea how i fail FnN. stupid big boobs!!! i hate u!!! dunno how u count the marks one. i get D7 eh faggot!!! lol got another amazing thing. i got A1 for mt. lol. from E8 jump to B3 jump to A1. like triple jump like that. although distance short but aleast i got improve ^^. lol y i so qing song tdy? tdy dun feel so stuffy. i think cos i get to pour my feelings out to someone tdy :D. haha. mood not gd tdy. got tht relieved n qing song feeling. its like being released after being tied up by the world's tigtest belt. anw, my eng get B3 though :( must buck up n get A

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